What will bring me joy and happiness in life?
In pursuit of happiness, we chase dreams and work towards personal goals.
Perhaps it’s a romantic relationship, improved family relationships, job promotion, new car, pay raise, business idea, academic or athletic accomplishments, etc.
But once we accomplish our one, big goal – it is on to the next thing! We barely even had time to feel happy about our accomplishment!
The fact is, event-based happiness is almost always fleeting
Happiness is something you have to create by way of a lifestyle choice. Yes, you have to CHOOSE to be contented and happy.
The habits you create in your life directly impact the happiness you will experience in your life.
If you talk to genuinely happy Christian women, you will often notice a similarity in lifestyle choices that directly impact their joy and contentment with life.
Below are 9 successful habits of all happy Christian women.
1.) They Don’t Complain
When you think of people who are uplifting and enjoyable to be around, are they full of negativity and complaints?
This isn’t referring to someone needing to discuss a difficult day or a frustrating life circumstance.
This is referring to someone who can find something wrong with everything, gossips about others, and spreads negativity wherever they go.
If you can identify a pattern of complaining in your life, work on focusing this habit in the opposite direction.
There is truly always something to be positive about if you search for it.
Perhaps it’s your health, having a loving friend, a steady job, a beautiful day, or the fact that you are the Daughter of the King!
If you are in a bad mood and can’t find anything positive to say, don’t say anything at all. Better yet, channel that negative energy into speaking kindness into someone else’s day.
Choosing to allow kind and uplifting words to come out of your mouth has a way of putting them into your mind and heart!
Happiness is something you have to choose. So choose it and speak it!
Ephesians 4:29 “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”
Related Article: 9 Signs You Have Become a Negative Person
2.) They Spend Time and Money on Other People
Research shows that spending money on other people actually makes you happier than if you spend it on yourself?
The same goes for spending your time helping someone else.
Happy people can often be found sending a gift & hand-written note of encouragement, assisting a friend or family in need, and volunteering their time to a kind project.
Kindness is contagious!
When you give of yourself to others, you often end up feeling more blessed and happy than the people you served!
Acts 20:35 “In all things I have shown you that by working hard in this way we must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.”
3.) They Don’t Waste Time Worrying About What People Think Of Them
Reality Check: There will always be someone who dislikes you for no reason, doesn’t agree with you on certain subjects, and talks negatively about you behind your back.
If you allow these opinions to control your life, you will never be able to find joy in the life God has given you!
It is only natural to be self-conscious and want other’s to like you, but you must find a way to accept who God made you to be.
Only change something about yourself if you are certain it is something God wants of you.
- Examples: A sharp tongue, quick temper, resentment against someone else, a viewpoint that doesn’t line up with the Bible, etc.
Do NOT change something about yourself if you feel pressure from other people or the society you live in.
- Examples: Pressure to be a size 4 with no signs of aging, desire to have a certain lifestyle appearance on social media, and absolutely any personal or political viewpoints that goes against Scripture.
To be truly happy, you need to find your identify in Christ!
He created you with your own unique personality, character traits, body type, capabilities, talents, and limitations!
The devil loves nothing more than to make you doubt yourself and your abilities because he knows that it limits you from accomplishing things for the glory of God.
Focus on what God made you good at and be contented with it!
Proverbs 29:25 “The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe.”
Related Article: 7 Tips to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
4.) They have a Happy Appearance
Have you ever noticed that some of the nicest people you have ever met had a “kind face”.
They just looked like they were filled with the joy of the Lord!
Throughout life, never underestimate the power of a warm, genuine smile. A smile signifies that you are a positive, happy individual – someone who is a joy to be around!
This physical trait helps people to relax and warm-up to you much quicker.
Have you ever chosen to smile and laugh, even when your heart was aching?
Choosing to be joyful (and showing it on your face) has a huge impact on how you feel internally.
Side Note: This does NOT mean that you have to smile, be agreeable and appear weak when you are in a circumstance where you need to be firm and serious. There will be times in life when a smile is not appropriate.
Proverbs 15:13 “A glad heart makes a cheerful face, but by sorrow of heart the spirit is crushed.”
Proverbs 31:25 “Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come.”
5.) They Learn to Say “No”
This is a practical life skill that every person needs to learn!
Some women are so busy trying to please other people that they forget about the importance of slowing down and taking care of themselves.
Learning to say “No”, turning people down, and being selective with the things you take on are habits that you need to implement in your life!
It isn’t unkind or selfish to admit to yourself and others that you are too tired or stretched too thin to take on another responsibility.
If you find it difficult to decline people’s requests, start practicing!
And you do not need to give a long, detailed explanation.
Just say, “No, I won’t be able to do that.” You can even add a “I have other obligations” or “Thanks for thinking of me” if you feel the need.
This life skill will make you a lot happier and open up your time to spend on things that are truly important.
The needs of others are important, but you can’t fulfill your God-given purpose if you are stretching yourself too thin and taking on other’s responsibilities.
Read the story of Mary and Martha: Luke 10:38-42
6.) They Take Responsibility For Their Mistakes
There is something very freeing about being willing to accept when you are wrong.
Happy Christian women cannot have dishonest habits like blame-shifting, guilt-tripping, and dishonesty.
When you have done something wrong, don’t try to hide the truth!
Choose to say, “I apologize, that was an oversight on my part. I will work on correcting it immediately” or “I am sorry. I was wrong. Will you please forgive me for *insert problem here*.”
Take responsibility! Don’t blame your mistakes on other people!
This is a sign of insecurity and selfishness. People who blame-shift lose the respect of those around them and built an environment of distrust and resentment.
The sign of a good teammate, spouse, parent, and leader is taking responsibility for a mistake and taking immediate action to remedy it.
Proverbs 12:22 “Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord, but those who act faithfully are his delight.”
7.) They Make Sure their “Relationship With Christ” is In Their Daily Routine
The best thing anyone can do is start off their day with reading the Bible or a devotional.
And on those busy mornings when that doesn’t happen, make sure to talk to God throughout the day.
Pray about the things that cause you worry and anxiety. Pray for the things that weigh down your heart.
Always pray for God’s protection and safety for yourself and the ones you love.
If something is on your mind during the day, talk to Him! Christ is suppose to be your Best Friend, so talk out loud!
Having Christ beside you every day can give you peace and joy like nothing else.
Philippians 4: 6-7 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
8.) Put the Past Behind You
Every woman you meet has a difficult story from her life. Something deeply hurtful that she had to work through and move past.
Is there something in your past that you haven’t forgiven and are still deeply resentful for?
Sometimes, this has to do with the deeply wrong things people have done to you.
Other times, it has to do with past mistakes that you have made and can’t forgive yourself for.
If there is something in your life that is holding you back from moving on and being happy, you absolutely need to address it!
Perhaps you need to see a Christian counselor or therapist.
Whatever the case is, you need to make the CHOICE to forgive the past and allow yourself to move forward.
Philippians 3:13 “I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead…”
9.) They Choose Their Friends Wisely
Happy Christian women know that their closest friends are also their biggest counselors and influencers.
The women in their “inner, trust circle” of their lives are kind, encouraging, generous, strong in their faith, and confident with who God made them to be!
Do you have close friends who gossip, seem haughty, and are never satisfied with what they currently have in life.
Do they encourage you to be contented and to count your blessings?
Or do their bad habits rub off on you, turning you into a discontented, gossiping, negative person?
Choose friends who build you up and encourage your relationship with Christ.
Proverbs 13:20 “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.”
Proverbs 18:24 “A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”
- 9 Types of Toxic People the Bible Warns About
- 5 Tips to Overcome Jealousy as a Christian Woman
- 7 Tips to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.” Oscar Wilde
Be the kind of person that other’s enjoy being around!
Remember, happiness is a choice. Choose to live by the fruits of the Spirit and you will find yourself to be a much more positive and happy Christian woman.
Galatians 5:22-23 “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.”